Modern women are known for wearing all the hats – from wife and mom to entrepreneur and boss, and everywhere between. But we’ve noticed a disturbing trend among those who do the most – a feeling that they’re an impostor in their own life.
And we’re not talking about those fleeting feelings we’ve all had – in a meeting or a class or when chatting with a fellow parent – where you feel unsure or don’t know much about the task at hand. We’re talking about pervasive feelings that you might lose it all if the right person came along, pointed their finger, and told everyone around you that you’ve been faking it all this time.
This is a real psychological phenomenon, not just a simple talking point. It’s real, and it’s harmful. Because the feeling of being a fraud, of being “found out,” of doubting your hard-earned accomplishments gets in the way of not just enjoying what you have earned but also of accomplishing even more.
The thing that really bothers us is that mostly women are affected by impostor syndrome. It’s almost as though we’ve been conditioned to question ourselves to the point where we think we’re not worthy of our own successes. This cycle is incredibly difficult to break, because self-reflection is what leads to emotional growth and understanding of others’ experiences. So how do we give that up without losing that empathetic part of us that makes us such great moms, bosses and friends?
Unfortunately, we don’t have the answers, but there’s one approach that seems to be our greatest ally in this internal battle – balance. Balance between critical thinking and confidence; self-reflection and self-doubt; striving for more while being proud of all you’ve done.
Your successes aren’t in any way due to luck or circumstance or coincidence. We all have some advantages in life, whether it’s a supportive network or killer confidence, but the actual work – the goals you’ve reached and adversity you’ve fought to get where you are – that’s all on you, and you should take the credit.
At La Vie en Rose, we see zero impostors in the wonderful women who work, shop, live, parent, laugh and cry with us. We see only hard-working, humble, badass ladies who not only know what they’re doing, but who know how to make life better for everyone around them.
You are not an impostor; you are exactly where you deserve to be.